} ♥ thelittlegurlwithATTITUDE` ☆

♥mydailesrants~ Sunday, January 25, 2009

well later going imm dunno which place to eat , reunion dinner with my family and my er gu de family.
just came back from MAJONG session @t love place .
lose to jin long .
haha*
mi , love , james , raynol , jin long and junior
den headed home after breakfast wit junlong , cuz love slping den the three of them went home.
tok bout someting.

maybe i should start to let go.
he sae no point hurtin myself so much .
wad he said just now is the same as love.
i feelin super miserable loving him as he dunno ,
even he noe .. there`s no much difference .
it`s been three months since loving him so painfully silently deeply in my heart.
onli love n james noe.

been one month never mit him go out ler,
no smilness on my face ever since i never mit him .
ever since i never tok to him .
ever since i never plae psp , been pinch by him
everything in my heart memories of him seems to be there deeply .
no matter ware i go .
no matter wad i do .

shopping or wad.
singing or slacking
toking or playin
he kiip appearing in my mind all day long

i reali miss those days playing psp tokin on phone with him
chatting.. msgging

fridae i tried to sing the song that he first ex sing to him ,
i always sing that song . but fridae was the first day i cant sing tad song due to my voice breaks down . i cant sing high pitch ..
i vomited blood after singing.
it`s painful forcing my self to sing while i noe i cant manage to sing.

i reali miss him a lot.
this month.
days without him , i survive but in the sadness world.
lucky there`s my love to be with mi .

im tryin to hard to ferget him ,
since last month
but i reali cant.

whenever i see STARS it REMIND mi of HIM .
whenever i see PANDA it REMIND mi of HIM , calling nick of PANDA TAMAGOTCHI.
whenever i say love n james is STM it REMIND MI OF HIM AGAIN , cuz he is my STM PANDA TAMAGOTCHI OWNER.

how i wish , u are not ******* with a **** and a ***
but it`s too late.

but i got to thanks u for all those things u do in the past for mi , buying cigs and stuff, bringing mi out to plae , bring mi to places that i wanna go , bring mi to OCH when i said i wanna go , bring mi to loyang when i said i wanto go and pray , bought mi the phone for xmas last year , chatting and slacking with mi downstairs my house til morning , whenever i go drinking u sure come and fetch mi home , whenever i saw ghost u accompany mi chat til i fall asleep , when im hungry at home u at work , u after work or in between come buy food and drinks for mi , when im bored u are there to accompany mi . all this is forever in my heart , is hard to replace u with others .
u are PERFECT TYPE FOR A GOOD BOYFREN , but u just short of 10% which u are ****** and having a **** and a *** .
that`s all.

love and james said that to mi also .
i feel lik crying whenever i tink of u ,
i reali feel lik painful and hurt , loving u so deeeply. in my heart.

is reali not the same feeling tad i ever love before ,
never ever i love someone so deeply lik u .

my past relationship although some they have **** , but i stil can let go of them after few`s week.
but u are STUCK in my MIND lik months , thinking and missing and it kiip rewinding all those memories we have.
i realie miss it fcuking much .
u noe how much i reali wanna tell u , i reali wan to have the courage to tell u how fcuking much i love u , but i cant .
all i wish is that u can be happy , dun ever kiip all those sad stuff to urself , not matter wad u nid a listener ear i ferever be here to listen to wad u got to sae.
time isnt a matter to mi , all i wan is u to bE HAPPY u birthdae is coming soon in ONE MONTH TIME , although u everytime u never celebrate u birthdae but i reali wish before ur birthdae we can play psp , chat , sms , hang out downstairs my house , go out with love n james once again .
i fcuking miss u loads .

im breaking to tears once again , i remember those time siting in ur car , window and sensor tad scared both of us not to slp not to go home , kip rounding around jurong area.

i reali wish i can play bomberman with u again , playin battle ship with u again .
toking rubbish and smses.

i reali miss those days although is not long , but whenver i nid someone to tok to , i just cor ur hp , u answer and tok on phone for hours.
i realie miss it loads. ~!

love n james ask mi to give up on u , love ask mi to gave up on u long time but i tried i failed . i failed twice , the feeling is so deepp~! til i cant even ferget u . it`s painful fcuking painful u noe .
i lied to myself sayin i dun love u no more , tryin to find a bf to ferget u , but i duno whose the guy i can find to replace u .
no one ever treat mi so good tad wherever i wanna go i just give a cor and come , no matter when and wad i wanna play they will acompany mi to plae . u the first one that eveer let mi felt so hurt b4.

JOLINE♥

7:58 AM